Thoughts in Autumn

It is fall. The summer is over, washed away under crisp breezes, brilliant leaves in angled sun, and the early nightfalls after daylight savings time.

Cowboys are rounding up their cattle. Students are back in school. The peaks are gathering snow.

And I sit. I only burn one lamp, next to my bed. Friends and family are spread out over continents, from Asia to America. I sit and think, and think my thoughts are only that.

I think about all sorts of things. Benjamin Franklin crosses my mind. He seems never to have been idle. Like Jefferson. Men of action, but also intelligence. Certainly not passive. I critique myself, as I so often do. I am passive. I read, I listen to the radio and recorded music. I falter when I have to produce a finished product. I hesitate when the proper guiding word is required. I procrastinate and put off even the calling of friends, the writing of letters, the making of gifts.

We are all wont to sluggishness, to the easy way. In fact, our society is in large part built on the idea that the easy way is the best way. Google makes a search for information instantaneous, running shoes remove what discomfort they can from the uncomfortable act of running, and cars cocoon us from weather and distance and each other. I have to ask, as I do of myself, if this ease is the proper way? What does the gospel say about the easy way? About iPods? About the wisdom of man?

Grace. All I ask for is grace, that I can forgive myself, forgive others, for what I cannot understand. And then still get up, go, tell, and create.

Because it is fall. And the leaves are turning, and the cold is coming, and after all, we don't have much time.